Two Ears, One Mouth
I remember reading a quote by Abe Lincoln along the lines of this post’s title with the idea being that we ought to spend more time listening than talking. Here’s a good story I heard told by Dennis Wately, a motivational speaker, about the importance of listening. It goes something like this:
He was flying home on a relatively late flight from a speaking engagement and was told by his wife that she had scheduled a dinner engagement at their home that night. This was the last thing he wanted to hear. He was tired and wanted some down time. But it was too late to cancel so he resigned himself to putting on his best face.
So the guests arrived and it was all he could do to just keep his eyes open. He spent the majority of the evening just listening and nodding his head in agreement with whatever his guests happened to be talking about. Saying things like, “Tell me more” and “Uh huh” seemed to keep his guests from catching on to his true state of mind.
Afterwards, goodbyes were said and he and his wife went upstairs to their bedroom where the windows were open. They could hear the guests talking amongst themselves outside for awhile prior to getting into their car to leave. What they heard them saying was a lesson learned for Dennis and his wife. He heard them saying “Weren’t they the most fascinating couple you’ve ever met” and “they were such interesting and gracious hosts.” Dennis was astonished because all he had done was let them speak while saying very little about himself.
Another quote from Lincoln will bookend this post: “I’d rather remain silent and be thought of as a fool, then open my mouth and remove all doubt.”
